So, I came here to do “This Thing…”
But then I got sidetracked.
I’m learning how to use this strange new vehicle I now find myself in. Not only am I struggling with how to control and manipulate this “body” of matter, I must also sort thru these urges of hunger, thirst and cravings for “attention”. With each passing moment, I’m starting to get a feel for how this “physical body” works and the memory of “This Thing” that I originally came here to do began to resurface.
Yes! I came here to do” This Thing” …
But then I got sidetracked by these strange creatures that seem to be watching over me. Bombarding me with a bunch of annoying sounds and silly faces. These “caretakers” tell me what to do, how to behave, what to believe and how to “think”. These caretakers would also become sidetracked by other similar looking creatures that would tell them what to do, say, believe and “think”.
Sometimes, my caretakers would become so distracted by events in this odd world, that they would place me in front of this strange little magical box that emits pretty lights and sounds. Instantly, I became addicted to this “box” of images and creatures that looked somewhat similar to my caretakers. Soon, I desired to watch this “box” more than anything else. Eventually, I completely forgot “This Thing” that I came here to do.
One day, one of my caretakers took me to a new place filled with lots of other little strange creatures that looked similar to me. Surprisingly, I was left there. At first, I was shocked by all of the other little creatures that were running around screaming. It seems as if we were all puzzled as to why our own caretakers left us here with these new “caretakers”. After a period of having these new caretakers talk at us and try to make us understand a bunch of squiggly lines and symbols, my normal caretakers came back to collect me.
This cycle repeated almost daily. Eventually I became accustomed to this place that everyone agreed to call “school”. After many years of interaction with my friends from school, the faint memory of “This Thing” that I came here to do was starting to resurface yet again.
So, I came here to do “This Thing” …
But then I got sidetracked.
Now there is a multitude of people telling me what to do, say, believe and “think”. These commands were coming from everyone and everywhere! As a species, it appears that everyone has agreed to follow the same orders and would assist in enforcing these instructions of how one should “live” on everyone. If anyone chose to ignore these “laws”, they would be perceived as rebels or outlaws and would be ridiculed and socially excluded.
The most popular means of distributing these written and unwritten “laws” was that same magical box of lights and sound that I became addicted to when I was younger; “The Television”. The majority of what was shown on the television was to reinforce what I learned at school, church and at home.
Slowly, I started to become more comfortable with doing “what I was told”. I found it easy, being that everyone else was following the same orders as well. However, one night while sleeping, I had a very strange dream that once again reminded me of “This Thing” that I originally came here to do.
Hey! I remember now! I came here to do “This Thing” …
But then I got sidetracked.
My parents told me that I was now an “adult” and that it was time for me to go out into the world “on my own”.
According to my “education”, the first step in becoming “independent” is to obtain a “job”. So I had to go out and “ask” various people who I did not know for job. After acquiring “employment”, I spent the majority of my waking hours following instructions given to me by yet another a new group of people, who also appeared to work in concert with the usual suspects who would tell me what to do, say, think and believe. However, my new “employers” gave me “money” in exchange for the right to tell me what to do. Every command that came from my employers was for the sole purpose of assisting my employers in achieving “That Thing” that they themselves came here to do.
Making money for them while achieving “their dreams” and “growing their business”, was the sole purpose of my services for them . This “exchange” in which I am to give them the majority of my adult lifetime for a few pieces of paper that represented some agreed upon value, seemed strange to me at first. However, I got used to it.
After a few years of this work-home-work cycle, I eventually met a very beautiful woman who also found the “strangeness” of this life very peculiar, just as I did. She also reminded me of “my own greatness” and at that very moment I remembered that I came here to do “This Thing.
Finally, I remember now, I came here to do This Thing … but then I got sidetracked with marrying that beautiful woman. Also, i became even more sidetracked with having 3 children, a mortgage, 2 cars, student loans, a dog and a cat and a bundle of debt that my employer has yet to allow me to generate enough income to re-pay.
But hey, I’m doing exactly what “everyone” told me to do in order to “pursue” happiness and achieve the “American Dream” that I was programmed to follow. According to my parents, neighbors and society, I’ve achieved success.
Meanwhile, two simple questions continued to nag at my core:
“Why am I here?
What in the hell was I supposed to do again?”
The answer evaded me for years. As time passed, I watched my children become adults as I watched my parents pass away. I was fully entrenched in what I was now to believe as “living life”.
If only I could remember That Thing I came here to do!
Reflective is my mood as I lay here in this hospital bed surrounded by my wife, children and 7 grandchildren. As they sadly watch me prepare to make my departure, I take one final glance into the eyes of my family. I take special note of the opposite paths that I and my 2 month old granddaughter are embarking upon.
At that very moment, I was once again visited by that memory of “This Thing” that I originally came here to do. This time it was strongest I ‘ve ever felt. I began to feel this overwhelming sense of joy that I have finally remembered what it was that I came here to do. As I motioned to my wife to come closer so that I could tell her;
“Alas…I remember now, I came here to do This Thing …”
But then I got sidetracked by this indescribable peace that came over me as I took my last breath.
– M Sa-Ra ©2009